Tuesday, July 8, 2008

will the real adult please stand up?

one of my family's favorite movies is "grosse pointe blank," wherein john cusack (also known as the companion of my future life) plays a professional killer trying to decide whether or not to attend his 10-year high school reunion. the possibility is fraught with peril as his line of work makes for slightly awkward conversations (old high school friend: "i'm a dentist." john cusack: "i killed the president of paraguay with a fork.") and because he will come face to face with his high school flame, debbie, who is still sort of mad that he abandoned her on prom night and never, ever called again. hilarity, 80s dancing, romance and a few gruesome murders ensue. a good time is had by all.

the only flaw is that john cusack was really too old (31 years old, in fact), to play a character going to a 10-year high school reunion. (that, by the way, makes him 42 years old today, which, for the record, is totally fine with me...) i think this discrepancy made me believe, as i watched the movie over and over again, that i would never be old enough to have a 10-year high school reunion. or that by the time my 10-year high school reunion did come along, i would feel like and be a for-real adult who could take down a nasty assassin opponent with a fountain pen, or at least remember to put out the garbage and not run out of clean underwear.

well, i got an e-mail about my high school reunion a few days ago, and i am wearing my last pair of clean unmentionables, so you do the math. the thing of it is, a 10-year reunion doesn't make me feel old. it makes me feel... unready. like i should be something by now that i'm not. or like i should have more figured out, or more done. just something more. but more what? i am not exactly sure. all i know is, i am still waiting to feel grown up.

at times like these, it is easy to fall into the "things i have NOT accomplished" trap. i don't own a house or have a master's degree. my parents had to buy my car. the only furniture i own is a bed, a desk, a bookshelf and a few end tables. my salary and my age are practically the same number. i don't have a husband, kids or a 401 (k). i still eat pasta a couple times a week, if i remember to eat dinner at all. i am still paying off student loans, i sleep late on saturdays and i let my room get really, really messy. and there are about a million other things i don't know how to do, or do badly.

but, instead of dwelling on all of that (too late?), i am going to think about all the things i HAVE accomplished in the past 10 years (or really, just nine years since my reunion isn't until next summer. so, even better!). here is just a small sampling:

lived in boston, london, florida, japan, denver and now, slc.
helped tune an organ
traveled to spain, italy, france, austria, the czech republic, california, seattle, scotland, wales, montana, idaho, washington d.c., new york city, india, argentina and uruguay
on a related note: rode an elephant, punched someone in the paris metro, saw a play on broadway and an opera in vienna, danced with a gaucho
summitted a mountain
shook jake gyllenhaal's hand (and managed not to wet myself. hurrah for adulthood!)
sewed a quilt
bought a bike and rode it for 102 miles
fell in love
met a pet psychic
mastered peanut butter bon-bons and spinach artichoke dip
kept a ficus tree alive
marched in a protest
learned to forgive
found my own mechanic
learned a new language, and how to fill my car tires with air
slept on a houseboat
worked at a high-circulation daily newspaper
drove across the country
finally got up on water skis
became the president of something (that is not a mia maid class)
bought my very own christmas tree

there. that feels better.

7 comments:

Kate said...

LOVE "Grosse Pointe Blank" for so many reasons:

1. John Cusack
2. The Jeopardy "Before & After" category quality of the title
3. My dad's upbringing in Grosse Pointe, which allows him to add interesting tidbits about film locations

Joel said...

Totally agree with your comments.. Mine was last year....I did not go I was out of the country....and I am still aquiring student loans......

Marcelina Moreno said...

Frances not that it will make you feel any better but next Sunday I am going to turn 30 and you are far more accomplished than I am. I admire your passion and knowledge for the gospel so much and I am glad that I have the opportunity to learn from you.

Jill N said...

Funny, I made a list just like yours not too long ago...It always looks better on paper. Hope you have fun at the reunion sharing your experiences from pounding the pavement. I'll still be keeping in real in Africa--with even LESS furniture than you've got now :)

imitate said...

"Grosse Point Blank" is one of my favorite movies, just for the record.

Again, something that won't make YOU feel any better, but in 10 days, my graduating class will be celebrating their 20 (yes, i said 20!!!) year reunion. (In a sidenote, I will not be there as I will be attending The Police/Elvis Costello show. I'm so excited I could pee.) I think it's human nature to feel like you haven't done the things you wanted to do by a certain time. I never thought I'd be 38, single with no children, and skipping my 20-year reunion to go to a concert of a 20-year reunion. But I digress. Mostly I was just excited about the GPB reference, and I wanted to whine a little about being (evidently) 10 years older than you, and I've NEVER ridden an elephant.

And just remember, Frances, you can never go home again, but apparently you can shop there.

k8 said...

here's what i think, you have like 60 more years to have a 401K and a clean room and a couple of kids and bedroom furniture. but the time to punch people on the Paris metro and ride your bicycle 102 miles is right now. hooray for you for being so awesome.

BagLady said...

its actually 102 TWO times or 204 miles...however you want to put it.