Tuesday, January 19, 2010

catch me if you can

one of my favorite jokes to tell when i was a kid was about a family of tomatoes. there was a daddy tomato and a mommy tomato and a little boy tomato. one day they were walking down the street (tomatoes walking! already so funny!) and the little boy tomato was having trouble keeping up. he kept falling behind and the daddy tomato was getting pretty annoyed. finally, without realizing the little boy tomato was right behind him, the daddy tomato whipped around and squashed his own son! while shouting, "son, catch up!"

catch up! ketchup!

i love that one.

all of that to say, let's catch up! (ketchup!)

for starters, there are a few glaring omissions on my "favorites of 2009" lists of the last post. thankfully i was reminded of them while reading emdawg's yearend lists. so, without further ado, i would hereby like to state that "(500) days of summer" and "away we go" were two more of my favorite movies of last year. even more than "star trek" and "new moon." (gasp!)

there. that feels better.

for those of you concerned with the progress of the 28 goals (and i assume that this is all of you), i am pleased to report that my goal to visit all the smithsonian museums is moving along quite nicely. mel b and i hit up the national gallery last week for an exhibit of robert bergman portraits (delightful) and emily h. and i spent yesterday afternoon in the museum of natural history (thanks, MLK!) drooling over the hope diamond, scoping out the best nature photography of the year and watching a 3D imax movie about the ocean.

i am pretty excited about the ocean these days, you see, because i am going to australia!

what the what?!?

that's right folks. it's a big johnson family exodus, actually. though only one johnson family member will be riding his motorcycle from sydney to perth and back. i'll let you guess which one that might be. the rest of us will be sitting on beaches, hugging kangaroos and snorkeling the great barrier reef. or, at least that is what i hope.

anyone know if i can get scuba certified in a month?

i also did a little branching out in my museum visiting this weekend and headed to the national geographic museum, where they currently have an exhibit about the terra cotta soldiers buried in the tomb of the first chinese emperor, complete with some of the terra cotta soldiers themselves. if you prefer to visit museum exhibits about chinese history with someone who can read all the plaques in a fake chinese accent, i suggest you go with guy smiley (which i did). and if you like jokes about things with no legs walking (which i do. see above), then he's your man, too.

check it out.

a neutron walks into a bar (a neutron walking! already so funny!) and says, "how much for a beer?" and the bartender says, "for you, no charge."

rimshot, heyo!

hilarious jokes aside, the exhibit was totally cool. if you live here, i wholeheartedly recommend it. if you don't, not to worry. you can just visit my own gravesite, which i expect will be something like that of emperor qin.

remember that one time my dad said it seemed like all i did was eat? well, i've been doing a lot of that lately, too. mostly because last week was restaurant week here in d.c. (don't even ask me about my progress on goal #13. it is not good. not good at all.) katie and i hit up filomena, a darling italian place in georgetown and i met ABK for dinner at firefly on friday. while i was waiting for him to arrive, it occured to me that once i came to d.c. to visit ABK, and now he comes to d.c. to visit me (and to go to fancy conferences on foreign relations. or something).

weirdsies. but in a good way.

and emily h. and i hit up coco sala yesterday for lunch. if you love chocolate (and we do), then you will love coco sala. they were only offering their restaurant week menu, which was still scrumptious, but some day i want to go back for a decadent, chocolate-infused brunch. doesn't that sound like heaven?

oh, oh! and of course i can't forget last's night trip to ray's hell burgers with jaron. such good burgers. and root beer on tap. the end.

jaron and i stopped at ray's on our way to see vetiver at the iota.

yeah, i had never heard of them either, but jaron said i was in the presence of greatness and he was right. they were awesome.

speaking of concerts in the middle of the week (so hip!), last thursday we went to see mary sing back-up with the carol bui band at the black cat (we ate at ben's chili bowl before that show. mediocre but famous chili dogs. and diet coke. the end.) and the headliner was this woman named joan as policewoman, who we learned was jeff buckley's girlfriend! which probably explains how she could rock brown leather pants, a gold top with shoulder pads and a ruffled neckline and a big fur coat, which jaron referred to as a lucille bluth fur.

in what is certainly a stellar decision, jaron moved out here last week and it has been super duper fun having him around. i like having a person from an old place with me in a new place and being able to show him some of the ropes has really helped me feel like this really is my home and i know what's going on.

i don't even have to use a subway map anymore!

so there.


Evan and Holly said...

Trust me the Terracotta Soldiers are worth seeing in person---as I have done! I only say this because Evan and I were discussing how you've been everywhere and the most recent vacations that we have taken are to Roosevelt, Utah (although we love it there). Evan has never been out of the country and does not even have a passport. So we are jealous.

Jasmin said...

I like the new blog look! BTW There's something just wrong about putting the words 'big' and 'johnson' right next to each other.

Sarita said...

Is this Jaron that is from Seattle and lived in the dude house on 13th and whose aunt is in joel's parent's ward and told us about her son who lived in SLC at this house where they have legendary halloween dance parties and then we ran into him in the foyer over a past christmas?

Just saying. How small is this world.

David's Holla Atchya! Blog said...

That is very exciting! I love your jokes.