the vow

a few months ago, AWD and i were talking about how getting married is a perfect opportunity to wipe the slate clean, get rid of bad old habits and start good new ones, even if you haven't made any other major changes like started a new job or moved to a new city or something like that. getting married let's you start over right where you are, which is kind of exciting.

plus, you have a buddy to work on getting better with. which is maybe the most exciting part of all.

so we've been trying to introduce some good patterns into our married life: eating healthy meals at home, reading our scriptures together, reaching out to new friends and to old ones, that sort of thing. and, though i usually forgo new year's resolutions in favor of birthday goals, i decided to up my game this year and do both. there are some things i've been wanting to work on and be more conscientious about and i decided i better get to it while i still have newlywed motivation on my side.

here they are.

1. commune regularly with heavenly father and jesus christ. includes scripture study, family and personal prayer, magnifying my calling, serving and not gossiping at work.

2. consume less. i buy a lot of things, and i'd like to stop doing that so much.

3. create more. i feel a passion for projects these days, and i want to make more time for that. i feel really productive when i am producing a tangible thing (go figure) and that's a good feeling.

4. be consistent. i have a tendency to go through flurries of lots of good effort and progress, followed by lulls of laziness and a lack of motivation. i'd like to even that out a little bit and make some sustained strides.

i feel really good about my 4 Cs, and i am excited to see what they bring me in the new year. and because i am sure you're dying to know as well, i'll be sure to keep you posted, too.

first day of my life

the other big thing that happened around here recently (besides, you know, getting hitched) is that i turned 30. on friday to be exact.

seems like a lot to be going down at once, i know, but that's how we roll around here.

for about a year i have been talking about how i wanted to do something really big for my 30th birthday. i figured it would be something like a trip to china, but getting married seemed like a pretty big deal, too, so i went for it.

in case you were wondering or worried, i had a lovely birthday, with lots of cupcakes and lunch out with my favorite people and a big wedding reception in salt lake to cap it off.

AWD also said he would buy me anything i wanted at my favorite SLC boutique, hip and humble, and he ended up buying me everything i wanted, which was even better.

even with so much excitement, i still had a little time to think about my favorite birthday questions, and here are the answers i have for you.

what i learned this year is that if you keep an open mind, an open heart and are willing to step outside your box and trust something (or someone) unexpected, you might find just what you didn't even know you were looking for.

and, bonus lesson! i also learned that, aside from open hearts, open minds and lots of faith, there is no secret formula or magic solution to will anything or anyone into your life. when you're ready, you're ready. and when it happens, it happens, and that's that. at least as far as i can gather.

as for a goal in the coming year, i would like to love as well as i am loved and i'd like to learn to save the very best-- my best news, my best jokes, my best thoughts and my best self-- for my home and my spouse and my family. i think it is going to take some practice to learn how to be a good partner, but i am up for the challenge.

and maybe another cupcake.

so this is the new year

my streak of being on time to work and church in 2011 took sort of a hit in this, the second week of january, but i am pleased to report that i have read my scriptures every day so far this year and i feel pretty good about that.

i also ordered a fancy new journal, anticipating that i will be a consistent (dare i say daily?) journal writer this year as well.

i have a few other resolutions rolling around in my head, but i don't think they are quite well-formed enough to commit to just yet. mostly i just want to be better than i was before, and i think we can all agree that you don't need a new year to make yourself new.

one goal i will most certainly not be making, this or probably any other year for a long time, is to eat a sensible dinner every night. because i just had some fudge oreos for dinner and they were delicious.

word of mouth

the news i have to share today did not happen today, but it has not been announced on the internet and it deserves to be.

it is this.

i finally beat miss angela in a game of "words with friends."

it has been a long time coming and i am pretty proud of it.

the end.

eleventh hour

my veterans day started off with a donut for breakfast, so it was pretty much destined to be great from the start. not like a thursday with no work can really be bad, but if it could be bad i have every confidence that a donut for breakfast could make it better.

we have been having the most gorgeous fall weather here lately: warm and colorful with blue skies and the sun up early in the morning (to all you daylight savings haters, i say hush. i am loving it) and yesterday was basically perfect in all four of those departments. after some errand-running in the morning, AWD and i spent the afternoon holding hands and strolling around arlington cemetery. which was even better than a donut. we saw the changing of the guard at the tomb of the unknowns, and just missed joe biden leaving after the wreath-laying ceremony, but we felt OK about that. if it had been george clooney laying the wreath and we had missed it, that would have been a different story.



arlington cemetery is a 100 percent lovely place, and i don't know why i hadn't been since i moved here. most of my pictures are still being held captive on film inside the holga, but here are a few digitals. though they don't really do anything in them justice.





dana and i rounded out the day with the weepies at the state theater.




let's talk about the weepies. i really like them. they sounded super different live, though not in a bad way and they told cute stories and kissed each other at the end (cus husband and wife) and i pretty much loved all of it. remember when i never used to go to concerts? what was i thinking?

plus we parked the car in a sort of sketchy spot and didn't get towed, plus i didn't run out of gas even though my light had been on for a while, plus dana made the last train back to the city. veterans day miracles all around.

this evening i am fleeing south to watch heather and nathan's kids while they run the richmond half-marathon (they are amazing) and then i think i'll curl up in a sunny spot and read and sleep for the rest of the weekend.

i hope you get to do the same.

bye-atus

hello, children.

it has been crazy training week at work, which means hella long hours and not much time left over for blogging. or anything else really. and in just a few minutes i am off to pennsylvania for a weekend bike ride through amish country.

but then i will be back, refreshed, and ready to entertain you with all the fascinating details of my life.

until then, my sweets. have a happy weekend.

slow pony home

this short week has felt like the longest week ever, which seems like a mean joke. but, it is almost over (thank.goodness) and exploding heads and sleep deprivation aside, here are some things that are making me really, really happy.

1. my first order of business upon leaving work will be a manicure. i just decided. and i think it was a good decision.

2. yesterday i got a text message from heathergirl, my best source for awesome music and television and tracy jordan-inspired cross-stitch pieces, which said, "would you be weirded out if i sent you a whole stack of CDs?" my answer was no.

3. EH and i are going to see "easy a" tonight. have you seen it? if you have anything bad to say about it, keep it to yourself. because i have been wanting to see it for a while now, and i would like to believe that it is going to be charming and funny and good. if, of course, you saw it and thought it was charming and funny and good, speak up!

4. i bought a holga camera! it's teal. and i am pretty stoked about it. i haven't done anything with it yet except hold it lovingly in my hands and figure out how to load it with film (which took quite long enough, thankyouverymuch), but that is about to change. i really like the idea of a camera that is designed to take imperfect pictures, because those happen to be my specialty.

5. i met liz for dinner on tuesday and she gave me a fedora as a belated birthday present. it was actually supposed to be a joke, but when i put it on it fit and looked just as good as i think any fedora is going to look so joke's on... well... i don't know who exactly. but, fedora goal now = accomplished.

6. boot and scarf weather is finally here.

7. the yard people came for the autumn bush pruning and also weeded the fence line that i had been passively-aggressively ignoring.

8. i built time into my weekend schedule for a nap and a sewing project.

i hope you have a nice list of things that are making you happy, too.

have a delightful weekend, lovies!

piano man

i can never remember if i am supposed to be embarrassed about liking billy joel, but this song started playing on my ipod while i was walking home from the metro tonight, and i decided that i don't care if i am supposed to be embarrassed or not. because it was just lovely.

i am a little embarrassed that the best version of it i could find on youtube was this one, but you can't win them all.

oh, fine. i'll admit it. i sort of like "13 going on 30," too.

forgive and forget?

all right, friends. let's just call a spade a spade. the blog is a little pathetic lately. every monday i think to myself, "this is the week i am going to post every single day!" and then, well, we've all seen what happens then.

and here is the deal. my parents are coming into town tomorrow (best.news.ever) so i don't see any blogging happening until next monday. when i will think to myself, "this is the week i am goig to post every single day!"

and this time, i will mean it.

and wiser, too

this morning i woke up and i was 29 years old.

this morning i put on my favorite ruffle-skirted dress and yellow shoes to celebrate.

this morning EH left me a plate of the most divine donuts i have ever tasted for breakfast.

and then i was flooded all day long with phone calls and e-mails and facebook messages and cards and letters from people who i love. if i could choose only one blessing to keep from my abundantly blessed life, it would be my people. i am blessed with such good people who make my life happy and special and full every single day.

if i could choose to keep two blessings from my abundantly blessed life, they would be my people and my cheekbones. but, i don't want to be too greedy.

this afternoon, i changed into these clothes...

... and did a little hip hop dance performance for my co-workers. because on a day when i receive so much, i like to give back a little, too. turns out, it's taken me three hour-long classes to master one minute worth of dance moves. but, it is a pretty bodacious minute if i do say so myself. i have a video, but i am performing again at my birthday party talent show tomorrow and i don't want to spoil the surprise for anyone. so you'll just have to wait on that.

this evening EH and i went out for some delicious sushi and now here i am, sitting in my cozy house, curled up with my sleek, stealthy stella, reflecting on another year when i got more than i ever could have asked for and certainly more than i could ever hope to deserve.

i had high hopes to lead up to today with some reflections on a few of my remaining 28 goals. but i think we can all see that didn't happen. so, i will have to do that reflecting later. i actually still have a few of those left over (there are sooo many smithsonians!), so i'll carry them with me into 29. and i have started so many things (sewing! dancing! cooking at home!) that i can't wait to keep doing forevermore.

as for this year, i decided to take it back down to the basics. well, first i thought about making one of those "30 things to do before i'm 30" lists. but then i got tired. so then i decided to take it back to the basics. one thing i've learned this year, and one goal for my next year.

here is what i have learned. and when i say that i learned it, what i mean is that i understand it for the first time, and believe it in a truly full way that has already changed my life. it is this.

it is possible to put our lives in the hands of the lord.

and when we do, he will take them and guide them. he will give us little promptings, small pieces of guidance along the way. and then he will let us do our best. and then he will make our best better. and then he will shine the light a little bit further out. and we will feel such peace and comfort. and we will feel that peace and comfort even when the things we were working for do not come. and we will feel that peace and comfort even when what happens and what we wanted to happen, what we hoped for so hard, are two very, very different things. when we have done what the lord has asked of us, when we have made him a part of our lives from the very beginning, when we have done it his way from the start, our confidence is pure and our peace is assured. even when nothing looks right to us, we can know that it is right in the sight of the lord, and that he will help us see it for what it really is.

i can't even tell you in words how deeply i know that this is true, how deeply i have learned this. i learned it because i lived it for what i really think is the first time. i could not have wished to learn anything better.

and my goal. this year i want to be a better friend. a better neighbor. a better community member. a better sister in the gospel. i want to keep plans, remember birthdays, return phone calls, make phone calls, give service, drop by because i felt like i should, send cards and letters and e-mails, know about people's lives from what they say and from what they don't say. i feel like for the last year or so i have been so focused on myself and rebuilding my new life in a new place that i have taken more than i have given and i would like to change that dynamic. starting now.

that plus my leftovers from 28. (i'm looking at you, perfectly fitting jeans!) so i've got my work cut out for me. but 29 is going to be just fine.

i like to move it, move it

tomorrow is moving day and i am only mildly terrified about the ratio of things i own to the space in which they must now fit.

gulp.

i can tell you, though, that planning for a move across town is significantly easier than planning for a move across the country, so this experience has been approximately 1 zillion times less stressful and sad and bittersweet than my last one.

and, concerns about closet space and ugly ceiling tiles aside, i am completely thrilled to be moving into my own space. (not that life at the chez bennett is not wonderful. i mean, i've done that gig for three out of the past five years, so it can't be that bad.) but i am really stoked to see my paintings and my dishes and my refrigerator magnets again. and to not be displaced by japanese flute teachers and various other houseguests. and to live with emily h. and, maybe most of all, to sleep on my new, amazing, swear-it's-a-cloud mattress. makes me happy just thinking about it.

once the suitcases and boxes and plastic tubs are unpacked and the chaos has settled, i'll let you know how it went. until then, keep your fingers crossed that i don't have to give away any more shoes.

sleep-in

moving day is fast approaching and i only have a few more major tasks to accomplish before i am ready to fly the bennett coop. today's mission: buy a mattress.

this will be my first grown-up, not-a-twin mattress, and will also be the first mattress i have ever purchased by my own, adult self. it's a big day. i've been listening to this song to get myself ready.



wish me luck! and feel free to come sleep over any time.

r and r

i have been feeling, as of late, a little bit like i am losing at life. i felt behind at work and at home, preoccupied with things i am sick of thinking about and worrying about, flaky and tired and like most of my time and effort was going to things out of my control.



one word summation: blerg.



so, with a long weekend looming and lots of people out of town and no committments or arrangements or anything else on my calendar, i sat down and made a list of all the things i wanted to do with three blissfully unplanned days.



and then i did them. all. it was magical. and i feel, once again, like i am ahead of the life-game.



weekend accomplishments included some lame but really necessary and thank-goodness-that's-done stuff such as: making a pile of documents to be shredded (bless that i am not audited by the IRS any time soon); buying sheets and towels and packing up my winter clothes and ordering a darling new quilt in anticipation of The Big Move (aka: TBM); cleaning the bathroom; so much laundry!; cleaning out my closet for the 900th time.



but mostly i spent three days doing a bunch of really fun stuff that i really wanted to do, like wandering around capitol hill and eating crepes at eastern market with liz, watching "iron man 2" (too many explosions, not enough downey) followed by delicious pizza with emily h., "young victoria" (i would like a marriage like albert and victoria, minus the nine children and premature death by typhoid, please), "exit through the gift shop" with LK at the totally awesome e street theater (if this is playing where you live, you must see it. so interesting, so funny and shepard fairey is so dreamy) and starting "battlestar galactica" over from the beginning (so far just as good the second time around). plus brunch with doobie and tara at american city diner, a really fascinating exhibit at the renwick of art created by japanese-american internment camp prisoners (thanks for the tip, dad!), a bike ride with athelia, some reading, and two naps! and, icing on the cake, i got to wear my new favorite skirt, which is a testament to retail miracles since i coveted it for months but refused to pay $98, and then one day it was $19 and i snatched it up.



all of which i captured with this awesome new camera app on my phone that makes your pictures look like they came from the 1960s.






















thanks, memorial day weekend. i needed that.

may, i

happy monday and happy may! remember how it was just april? what is that all about? the time is just flying by. luckily, i have isadora and her fancy camera to help capture all the best moments.

like this delicious cupcake from buzz cafe.

jaron and i went on a quest for the best cupcake in d.c. and baked and wired in georgetown was our winner (eat that, georgetown cupcake!) but this fancy treat was pretty delicious, too.

and like los campesinos! at the 9:30 club.



we got so close to the stage, and we danced until i felt like my head was going to fall off. so.fun.

and who would want to forget that smack and i wore practically the same outfit to work on friday?

teal dress. check. black cardigan. check. calling each other from now on before we get dressed for work. done and done.

it's also (finally) outdoor film festival season, which means playing "set" on blankets as the sun goes down.



divine.

here's to isadora! here's to may!

iheart

things i loved about my weekend:

a call from doobie, informing me he is moving here for the summer. joy!

driving straight to dupont circle without my GPS, finding a parking space right in front of sarah's apartment, sitting outside eating cookies and waffles at locolat, take two.

a mugging-free trip to northeast and diet coke (though not the music) at the rock n' roll hotel.

fancy new jewelry from LK's sister, sam. (check out her goods, yo.)

painting the community of hope health center as part of the greater dc cares serveathon. the warm fuzzy feeling that comes from helping people + a free t-shirt = win.

my new friend liz, who was totally game for vintage clothes shopping on u street even though we had only met an hour before and i had paint in my hair.

the georgia o'keeffe exhibit at the phillips collection. stunning. fascinating. i was in awe. if you live here, you must see it! (if you don't live here, can you get here before next weekend when it closes?)

sitting on the couch with miss angela, talking and talking and talking and laughing and talking and eating and talking some more.

popcorn with marshmellow creme.

talking to my parents for an hour.

talking to suvi for an hour.

cleaning out my closet.

curling up in my bed and waking up to the perfect rainy monday.

hope your weekend was just as grand.

wizards win! (einstein approves.)

it was the last home game of the season for the washington wizards last night and emily h. had the hottest tickets in town, so off we went to the verizon center for some sporting.

actually, i guess the wizards are pretty bad. but it turns out so are the indiana pacers, so it was a close game. in summary: we were up! we were down! it was close! it wasn't so close! i ate a hot dog! the wizards seemed to give up! the crowd seemed to give up! an adorable little boy won the half-time "simon says" game! the wizards got a second wind! the crowd got a second wind! someone got injured and fell on the floor but when he stood up to walk to the bench he looked totally fine! the wizards were up by one point! there were four seconds left! everyone called a million time outs! (i hate it when they do that!) the pacers shot a basket with less than three seconds left! it went in! it rolled around! it popped out!



the wizards won!



it was all very exciting.



!



then on the drive home we passed the massive statue of albert einstein outside the national academy of science. i have been meaning to visit said statue for a while now and so, it turns out, had robert and laura, so we all figured there was no time like the present and pulled over and made it happen.

albert einstein's statue is wearing sandals. i love that.



tomorrow i am off to boston (at 7:30 in the morning. from baltimore. gross.) where i will reunite with the whole johnson clan. for all the time we have all spent in boston, i can't remember a time when all four of us have been there together, so this will be a treat. (except, everyone start praying that the 45 degrees and raining weather forecast changes. because yuck.)



i hope your weekend is just as yummy!

search party

i have loved many, many books in my life, but i have always had a special place in my heart for the search for delicious.

i have the most vivid memories of an elementary school teacher (fourth grade, maybe?) reading us this book aloud, and me hanging on every word. it was magical, somehow, and it has stuck with me all these years more than almost any other book of my childhood.

specific details sort of faded after a while, but the basic plot as i remembered it was this: a kingdom. a dictionary. a disagreement about what food should qualify as the definition of delicious. an epic effort to determine said definition. a happy ending. (which i will not give away here.)

for years i have been bringing up this book whenever the opportunity presented itself. (because, you know, i talk about both kingdoms and dictionaries a lot.) and here's the thing. no one had ever heard of it. and then i started looking for it in bookstores and here's the thing. i could never find it. and then i started thinking i had made up the story myself and that i should write it and sell it and be rich.

but here's the thing. i knew it had to be out there somewhere.

and then on saturday jaron handed me a little package wrapped in newspaper. and here's the thing. i opened it and the search for delicious was inside. (with this fancy new cover.)

and i was so happy i wanted to cry. but instead i just stared in amazement at my old, dear, long-lost friend.

and then i started reading. and i read all weekend, and until late on monday night, when i finished with a satisfied sigh.

and here's the thing. it was so much better than i remembered!

the writing was more effortless and funny, the plot was more intricate and careful and touching, the characters were more lovable (and i had totally forgotten about the dwarves, the woldwellers, the mermaid and the villain, hemlock. how did that happen?) and the ending was so much more poignant and happy.

i was in heaven.

it was magic all over again.

you might even say it was, well, delicious.

(oh hey, p.s. if it's not obvious already, you should go out right now and read this book. seriously. the (happy) end.)

baby got (my) back

well kids, it's been a long, hard week. i feel tired in every way that a person can be tired. i came home from work today and slept for almost three hours because i did not have the energy, physical, emotional or otherwise, to do anything else.

in a word, i am spent.

but here is the good news. the fries and milkshakes at elevation burger are delicious, as emily h. and i discovered this evening, and they can cure almost any ill. as can a good laugh with a good, good friend.

more good news is that michelle, one of my dearest and most favorite mission companions, is coming to visit tomorrow and i cannot wait to see her and soak up her good vibes. we are going to eat good food and sew and run errands like crazy so that, by some miracle, i will be ready to leave for australia on tuesday. (tuesday!)

(tuesday!)

and maybe the best news of all is that, even though there are people out there who are only looking out for themselves, there are also people out there who are always looking out for you. i really believe that. at some point or another, all our backs need getting. and i am really grateful for the people who have mine.

i like them apples

there is an important new member of my gadget family, and i feel i have been most remiss in introducing her properly. a situation i intend to remedy right now.

i am speaking, of course, of my new iphone.

her name is isadora, though you may call her izzie for short.

as a fearful late adopter of technology, making the switch to an iphone was not something i took lightly. but now that i have finally taken the plunge, i have to say that my life is approximately 250 times better. and i have only scratched the surface of what isadora can do.

for one thing, i feel more awesome now that i have isadora, even if she's just sitting on my nightstand. just knowing she's there automatically increases my cool person cred. in my own mind, at least.

also, my whole cell-phone-owning life i have despised text messaging. truly. i was slow and always misspelling things and it made me so cranky every time. but now, i could text all day long! i am super fast with my pointer finger and that little touch screen (five times faster than before, according to jaron) and i love the zooming noise my messages make when they are sent. zoom! and off they go!

but most importantly, isadora has just made my life a whole lot easier. i have all the information i could ever want right there at my (pointer) finger tips. i don't get lost anymore, i don't have to come home to my computer to look things up. restaurants, directions, addresses, phone numbers, movie times. even the scriptures. all in the palm of my hand. we are a totally self-sustaining unit, isadora and i.

i mean sure, she has her flaws. her battery life leaves something to be desired, and she seems to get bad reception inside the casa de bennett and keeps hanging up on my mom. but isadora has really given me a new bar for true love. when i love a man as much as i love her, i'll know it's the real deal.

beantown/bentown

the main object of my recent trip to boston was to visit my big little brother who, in the grand tradition of our family, has taken up residence there for the time being.

i had not been back to boston since i graduated from college nearly seven years ago and, to be perfectly honest, i was a little nervous. there is something disconcerting about returning as a stranger to a place that was once a familiar home. and boston is a particularly crucial place in my life history.

simply put, the life i have now and the person i am now really all started there. boston was the first place i ever turned into a home on my own. it is the place where i fell in love for the first time, the place where i went through the temple for the first time. it is the place where i learned to really be myself. boston is the place where i decided what really mattered to me, and how i wanted to interact with the world around me. it is where i solidified ideas, opinions, my testimony of the gospel. it is where i met some of my dearest, closest, most important and loyal friends, who remain just that to this very day.

boston is where i really met myself for the first time, i think. and i guess that after all this time apart, i was worried that boston and i might not recognize each other anymore.

i should have known better. boston driving certainly hasn't gotten any better and not much else has changed either. five minutes off the plane and it was like we were never apart.

the weekend was really a whirlwind of cramming in as much as i could, with big little brother ben in the middle.

to sum up.

the union oyster house with sarah and KC. i always had to wait until my parents came to town to eat here, because i could never afford it when i was a student. so hurrah for being a working adult.

ben's first ride on the T.




mrs. mallard, plus jack, kack, lack, mack, nack, ouack, pack and quack at the public garden. if you haven't read "make way for ducklings" go do it right now.




my beloved beacon hill. i could spend the rest of my life walking up and down those streets. and we came upon the most delightful group of natty men in bow ties. perfect.




state house and faneuil hall.






the boston temple. one of the best memories of my entire life is going through the temple for the first time here, surrounded by more family members and friends than i can even remember. i still think that heaven will be something like that day, with loved ones all around. i adore this temple.




rubbing john harvard's foot for good luck. i don't know what that's all about, really, but it can't hurt.




and a visit with the quinns. these kids were two years old and six months old, respectively, the last time i took a picture with them. you may notice, they are a little bigger now. ten years old and eight years old, to be exact. and three more kids have come behind them. i won't lie, it sort of freaks me out.

told you it was a whirlwind. but a wonderful one to be sure.

dearest boston, may we never spend so much time apart again.